Journey to self – discovery (image from unsplash)
I Have Lost Myself, How Do I Find Myself?
I don’t know when it happened. Maybe it was during those countless nights scrolling mindlessly on my phone, or the days spent chasing dreams that didn’t really feel like mine. Somewhere along the way, I stopped recognizing myself. The spark I used to feel for life—the joy, the clarity—it all feels like a distant memory.
Maybe you’ve felt this too. Like you’re moving, but you’re not really living. It’s not that life is bad, but something is missing. That “something” is you.
I’ve realized that losing yourself doesn’t happen all at once. It’s gradual. It’s saying “yes” to things you should’ve said “no” to. It’s dimming your light to make others feel comfortable. It’s forgetting your own voice amidst the noise of everyone else’s expectations. But here’s the thing: just as you can lose yourself, you can also find yourself again.
Here’s what’s helping me:
1. Let the Truth Sink In
I had to admit it to myself first: I am lost. I spent months pretending everything was fine—telling myself I just needed a break, or that this was normal. But deep down, I knew. The longer I ignored it, the heavier the emptiness felt.
So, I started journaling. At first, it was messy. I wrote things like, “I feel stuck,” or “I don’t know what I’m doing anymore.” But with every raw, honest sentence, I felt a little lighter. The truth hurts, but it also heals.
Let the truth SINK! (image from unsplash)
2. Revisit What Lit You Up
Do you remember what used to make you come alive? I thought about the times when I felt most like myself. For me, it was designing things—taking a blank canvas and turning it into something beautiful. Somewhere along the way, I stopped doing it for fun and only did it for work.
I started small. I opened old files and revisited personal projects I’d left unfinished. It felt awkward at first, but then I felt a spark again. Whatever it was that used to light you up—whether it’s painting, writing, dancing, or just walking in nature—start there. Even if it feels foreign at first, keep going.
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3. Quiet the Noise
I realized that part of why I lost myself was because I was too tuned into everyone else’s voice. Instagram. LinkedIn. WhatsApp. It was constant noise, constantly reminding me what others were doing, achieving, and becoming.
So, I decided to take a break. I muted accounts, turned off notifications, and started spending more time with myself. And you know what? The silence was healing. It gave me space to hear my own voice again.
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4. Rebuild from the Inside Out
When I felt lost, I wanted someone else to fix me—a job, a relationship, something external. But I’ve learned that finding yourself starts from within. I began reading my Bible more, praying, and reflecting on what truly matters.
One verse stood out to me: “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10). It reminded me that I didn’t have to figure it all out at once. I just needed to be still and trust the process.
5. Give Yourself Grace
I used to be so hard on myself. I’d think, “How did you let it get this bad?” But blaming myself only made things worse. Instead, I started treating myself the way I’d treat a friend—with kindness and patience.
I reminded myself that this season of feeling lost isn’t permanent. It’s just a chapter, and like every chapter, it will pass.
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Finding yourself isn’t about becoming someone new; it’s about coming home to who you’ve always been. It’s a messy, beautiful, ongoing process. And if you’re feeling lost right now, know that you’re not alone.
The journey back to yourself starts with small, intentional steps. One honest conversation. One quiet moment. One brave decision to prioritize yourself again.
And maybe, just maybe, this time, you’ll discover a version of yourself that’s even better than before
Newness ( image from istock)
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LOST BUT NOT GONE 👣 was originally published in Mindful Mental Health on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.